• ASP
  You try to shoot yourself in the foot, but the most advanced thing you can manage is to cut your wrist.
• ASP.NET
  Find a gun, it falls apart. Put it back together, it falls apart again. You try using the .GUN Framework, it falls apart. You stab yourself in the foot instead.
• BASIC
  Shoot self in foot with water pistol. On big systems, continue until entire lower body is waterlogged.
• C#
  You shoot yourself in the foot, but first have to switch to unsafe mode.
• CSS
  You shoot your right foot with one hand, then switch hands to shoot your left foot but you realize that the gun has turned into a banana.
• HTML
  You cut a bullethole in your foot with nothing more than a small penknife, but you realize that to make it look convincing, you need to be using Dreamweaver.
• Javascript
  You’ve perfected a robust, rich user experience for shooting yourself in the foot. You then find that bullets are disabled on your gun.
• .NET
  You can now shoot yourself in the foot with any of fourteen weapons, ranging from an antique medieval crossbow to a laser-guided Destructo-Beam. However, all these weapons must be manufactured by Microsoft and you must pay Microsoft royalties every time you shoot yourself in the foot.
• PHP
  You shoot yourself in the foot with a gun made with pieces from 300 other guns.
• SQL
  SELECT @ammo:=bullet
  FROM gun
  WHERE trigger = ‘PULLED’;
  INSERT INTO leg (foot)
  VALUES (@ammo);
• Visual Basic
  You’ll only appear to have shot yourself in the foot, but you’ll have so much fun doing it you won’t care.
• XML
  You can’t actually shoot yourself in the foot; all you can do is describe the gun in painful detail.

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